Soul (Chaos #1) Read online

  “Humans are so strange,” Realtín said.

  “I’ll be out of your way in about three weeks,” I said. “Don’t worry.”

  “I’ll miss you,” she whispered in my ear, making me smile.

  Work passed uneventfully, and I was feeling better by the time I met up with Zoe.

  “Chinese?” she asked. “Something spicy to warm us up.”

  I nodded, and we strolled down the street.

  “Can’t believe the holidays are over already,” she said.

  “I’m just happy to have an excuse to spend so much time out of the house. I don’t have many shifts for the rest of the month as punishment for missing one.”

  “You missed a shift?”

  “Yeah, I flaked. Overslept.”

  “Oh.” She frowned. “How’s Drake?”

  “Fine.”

  She grinned. “So you’ve seen him again?”

  “Yep.”

  “Interesting.”

  “Not really. We’re just friends… barely.”

  She looked at me. “Have you slept with him?”

  “No!”

  “Have you kissed him?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Interesting.”

  “Stop saying that!”

  She wrapped her arm around me. “Then tell me something, and I won’t have to make up interesting shit in my head.”

  “He’s around for the next three weeks, but then he’s leaving again. I might see him once or twice, but that’ll be it.”

  She opened her mouth to say something when a hooded figure passing by grabbed her handbag and tried to run off with it. Zoe was so stunned that she held fast, and the thief pulled harder.

  I stamped on his foot and yanked his hood down, revealing his face. I didn’t recognise him, but the desperate look on his face was all too familiar. “Get lost,” I snapped, and his grip loosened.

  He threw a punch, but I dodged and elbowed him in the ribs.

  “Come on,” I said to Zoe, seeing Grim about to trip the thief, and Realtín aiming her fingers at his eyes. I heard his yowl of pain as I dragged Zoe away.

  “What the hell is he whining about?” she said, looking back.

  “Forget him. But next time, just let go of the bag.”

  “Fuck that. My phone’s in there. Delicate photos in that thing.”

  I shook my head. “Idiot.”

  The fae rejoined us. Realtín giggled excitedly. “Maybe life with you isn’t so boring after all.”

  I laughed, the adrenaline from the confrontation making me giddy.

  “Are you okay?” Zoe asked.

  “I’m better than ever,” I replied.

  Over dinner, we caught up on all of the gossip, and for the first time in two weeks, I was able to forget about the fae. So what if the fae were dangerous? So were humans. I wasn’t going to live in fear, and I wasn’t going to act as though my life was over.

  I walked Zoe home before heading to my own house, accompanied by Grim and Realtín. I saw Brendan in the distance, shining in the dark as if he were lit from the inside.

  “Following me?” I asked when we reached him.

  “Heard you had a problem today.”

  I frowned. “The purse-snatcher? That wasn’t a problem. He was more afraid of me than we were of him.”

  A strange expression came over his face. “Why is that, I wonder.”

  “What do you mean?”

  He looked surprised. “Nothing. I just wanted to make sure I didn’t have to deal with some of your more human problems.”

  I glared at Grim, who looked back at me innocently. “Everything’s fine. I’m going back to college tomorrow, and I don’t want a million fae there.”

  “I know.” He sighed. “I take it this is a provision to our deal. That I don’t have a choice in the matter.”

  I smiled and started walking again. “Glad you’ve caught up.”

  He kept pace with me but maintained a space between us.

  “I don’t have germs,” I said.

  He didn’t answer, but when we reached my house, he stopped me at the gate. “Are you sure you have to do this school thing?”

  “Positive.”

  “My people will be watching, but they won’t interfere unless they have to. Agreed?”

  I shrugged. “It’s just until the ceremony, right?”

  “I only need you alive until then.”

  “That makes me feel so much better. Good night.”

  The corner of his mouth lifted. “What, no kiss?”

  “You’re lucky your bodyguards are hiding around here somewhere,” I said sweetly and opened the gate.

  As I walked up to the house, I saw my father peering out of his bedroom window, his jaw clenched tight. I wondered why Brendan didn’t hide himself like the other fae.

  Inside, I heard my parents arguing as I went to bed. I locked my bedroom door, just in case.

  Chapter Eleven

  I awoke to see him standing over me with a pillow in his hand. I was frozen in the dark, choking on any words I might have used.

  He smiled, but there was something terrifying about it. When he moved the pillow close to my face, scratching sounds at the window distracted him.

  I screamed long and loud, not stopping until my mother ran into the room.

  “What’s going on?” she asked my father.

  He held out his empty hands. “Nightmare.”

  She sat on the edge of the bed and brushed the hair from my face. “Lie down, baby. Go back to sleep. There’s nothing to be afraid—”

  “She’s too old to be babied,” he said, pulling her to her feet. “Come on. Let’s have a drink.”

  She glanced back at me but let him pull her away from me. I hadn’t said a word.

  I looked at the window, but there was nothing there except a shadow passing the frame. I stayed awake that night until I heard my father snoring.

  Sweat poured down my back as I lay there in the dark, trembling all over.

  “…so many nightmares,” Grim was saying. “I wish we could—”

  “We can’t,” Realtín whispered. “He’ll have our heads. We’ll be free someday, Grim. We will. We just have to be good for a while. Do what he says.”

  The fact that I wasn’t alone was sort of comforting, and I quickly fell asleep again.

  ***

  My course wasn’t quite the relief I thought it would be. I couldn’t concentrate on the lectures, on anything really, apart from my dreams and the fae. They were slowly taking over my life.

  I felt a little twisted high whenever Brendan and Drake appeared. I felt low and down when a day passed without speaking to either of them. I had begun to jumble both souls together in my head, and I wasn’t sure who either of them was—not really.

  In my classes, Realtín had fun pulling hair and knocking things over. Her gleeful giggles made it even harder to concentrate. Grim, on the other hand, seemed to be enjoying the experience.

  “I’ve learned such things,” he exclaimed as I walked to a different class. “The way humans see the world is amazing. Is it like this every day?”

  “Pretty much,” I said under my breath. If anybody saw me talking to myself, I’d be mortally embarrassed. I checked my watch and made a decision. “Come on. I’m going to show you something a little different.”

  The three of us slipped into the back of an Irish Folklore lecture. In my first year, I had taken the course on impulse, but my father had freaked out, and I dropped it when I had to narrow down subjects in my second year. But I occasionally snuck back in. I found the course matter comforting, and I was curious to hear what Grim thought.

  The lecturer removed her sunglasses and stared at me for so long that I swallowed hard, thinking she might kick me out. After an awkward moment, she carried on, and I let out the breath I had been holding.

  “They discuss us?” Grim whispered. “This is a part of your learning? I thought we were all but forgotten in your world.”

  “Y
ou’re a story,” I explained. “A part of our heritage that we try to rationalise.”

  A smile spread across his face. “This will certainly be interesting.”

  “I thought you might enjoy it.”

  I barely listened to the lecture. I was too busy watching Grim’s enraptured expression. He kept leaping up in his seat as if he wanted to argue a point. I was growing fond of the brownie—Realtín, too, even if she was an annoying little troublemaker.

  Later, at lunch, I discovered I hadn’t brought the food I’d made that morning, so I decided to buy a roll at the canteen.

  “Where’s the lunch you made?” Grim asked, but I had to ignore him in the queue.

  I took the roll to my usual lunch table.

  Zoe was already there, munching on an energy bar. “How were your classes this morning?” she asked, taking a book out of her bag.

  “Not as bad as I expected. Kinda nice to be back.” I jerked my head at the book. “New assignment?”

  “Want to get a headstart. Going out with Darren tonight. You’re welcome to come with.”

  “Not in the mood to be a third wheel, thanks.”

  She shrugged. “Your loss.” She looked at my roll. “Wow, that looks good. They’ve upped the canteen food, I see.”

  I frowned. The roll was soggy and gross, and I was pretty sure it smelled. I lifted an eyebrow at Grim, who shook his head, looking worried. A closer look revealed something rotting in the centre.

  “I guess I’m not very hungry today.” I picked up the roll to throw it away, feeling a little weak at the knees.

  “Give it here then,” Zoe said, reaching for it.

  Realtín knocked the food out of my hand.

  “Sorry,” I said. “I’ll just clean this up and be right back. Watch my bag.”

  I cleared the mess and ducked into the hallway before Zoe noticed I had gone. “What the hell is going on?” I asked the fae. “That was bad, right?”

  “Glamoured,” Realtín hissed, practically spitting.

  “If it was glamoured, how did I see what it really looked like?” I demanded.

  “Maybe they wanted you to see,” Realtín said. “Did you smell it, Grim? Queen Mirela’s favourite punishment. Someone tried to poison Cara.”

  “Here,” he said. “At her school. She forgot her lunch this morning, but I put it in her bag. Somebody took it out so she would have to eat something else.”

  “Who could have gotten close enough to my bag?” I asked.

  Realtín flew around my head, flashing red. “Someone here.”

  “Are there fae working in the canteen?” I asked.

  “No,” Grim said. “The king’s guards should have been watching you more closely.” He bowed low. “I’m so sorry, Cara. I should have seen. I was distracted by all of the learning. It won’t happen again.”

  “It’s not your fault. Maybe it was an accident. A fae causing mischief rather than harm or something. I should get back to Zoe. I’m pretty sure no fae is going to openly attack me here, right?”

  Grim didn’t look certain of that.

  “Watch over her,” Realtín said. “I’ll go check with the guards to see what’s going on. We’ll have to tell the king.”

  “You don’t have to,” I said, but her distressed movements only sped up.

  “You could have been hurt,” she said. “He has to know they’re following you around.”

  “He might stop me from going to my classes,” I said. “Please, just leave it this time. We’ll be more careful. I promise.”

  The fae agreed. I was pretty sure neither they nor the other guards wanted to tell their king that his witness had almost been poisoned right under their noses.

  I spent the rest of the afternoon looking over my shoulder. There were enemies everywhere; I just didn’t recognise the faces. I hadn’t mentioned it to my fae friends, but I wondered if Sorcha was the one who wanted me dead. After all, nobody would suspect her of any wrongdoing if she claimed to be watching over me.

  I didn’t know who was at the school, or even how many were guarding me, and that made me more scared than the idea of a phantom attacker waiting for me to be alone. Having Grim by my side all day was reassuring. I would miss my fae friends when it was all over… if I lived that long.

  “Want to hang out for a while?” Zoe asked as we wandered down the hall after school.

  “Yeah, nothing better to do,” I teased.

  “Oh, no gorgeous blonds to be barely friends with?”

  “I’m all yours until Darren drags you away.” My grin fell when I saw my father’s car parked outside the main entrance. “Shit.”

  “What?” Her eyes followed my stare. “Oh. Want to run?”

  “I wish. What the hell does he want?”

  Dad got out of the car and glared at me. I had no choice but to go over to him.

  “What’s wrong? Mam okay?” I asked.

  “There was someone in your room,” he said. “I heard them stomping around. Who was it? Who do you have in our house?”

  I flinched. “Did you see someone?”

  “I heard them. Who is it? Tell me now, or I’ll—”

  “I have no idea who was in the house. I’ve been here all day. And now I’m going to Zoe’s house. Goodbye.”

  “Get in the car,” he said through clenched teeth.

  “I’m going to—”

  “Get. In.”

  There was no way on earth I was getting into a car with him when that big nasty vein in his forehead was popping so wildly.

  “I’m going to Zoe’s house,” I said calmly and walked away, even more grateful for the comforting presence of Grim.

  Dad dug his fingers into my shoulder and spun me around. “I’m not done with you.”

  “Are you ever going to be done with me?” I blurted.

  He sneered. “You’ll see, won’t you? Now get in the damn car.” Spittle landed on his jumper.

  I stared at it, numb again. He said my name, and I looked at him. His face was close to purple with rage, but I was certain he wouldn’t do anything in public. Almost certain.

  “I made plans with Zoe,” I said, taking small steps backward. I turned and hurried away from him, knowing all the while I was making a mistake. I should have gotten into the car. I should never have said a bloody word and just gotten into the car.

  I gave a little cry of pain as something connected with the back of my knee. I tumbled to the ground, absolutely mortified. I knew everyone was watching with a mixture of horror and glee. Our scene would create the kind of gossip that would never be forgotten, a stain that would last years. I realised too late that he wanted to shame me in public. That was my real punishment.

  “Leave her alone!” Zoe yelled, but she didn’t approach.

  I willed her to stay back. If he raised his hand to her, I would die of embarrassment. I just wanted it to be over, for everything to go away. I scrambled to my feet and tried to walk away again. I didn’t look back, even when he grabbed my hair and pulled me against his chest.

  Then I felt the shiver of fae magic and the biggest sense of relief in my life when a voice behind us spoke calmly and clearly. “Let her go. Right now.”

  Brendan.

  “Piss off,” Dad said, but he pushed me away and turned to swing a fist at Brendan.

  The faery blocked the punch with ease and knocked Dad to the ground. He gripped my father’s neck, making him gasp for air. I watched in fascination as Brendan did exactly what I had wanted to do. My father’s face turned white then red.

  “He can’t breathe,” I said. “Brendan. Let him go!”

  But Brendan had turned to stone, his eyes fixed on my father’s face.

  I desperately tried to pry his fingers away. “Stop it. Please!”

  “No,” Brendan ground out. “He didn’t obey. He attacked me for all to see. I promised you safety. I own you for now. I can’t be seen to allow some human to mark my property. The fae are always watching, Cara. This is a lesson for all of us.�
�

  “This isn’t how we do things.”

  He looked at me, his eyes a curious mix of purple and green. “Don’t you want him to be punished?”

  I took a deep breath, embarrassingly attracted to him at that second. That darkness had wound its way around my heart, squeezing any kind of decency out of it. “Not like this,” I whispered, tempted to stroke his face without even understanding why. Somebody was protecting me, finally, and it was all I could do not to throw myself at him.

  I tried to stay calm, but his anger filled the air, and it tasted like mine. I understood it. I had been hiding the exact same feeling for a long time. He was so angry, and he needed to put on a show. I understood his need to prove himself, but he was losing control. I could feel it slipping from him, shifting completely. Drake and Brendan were melding into one, both of them vying for position. That would weaken Brendan in his enemies’ eyes, and if they took him down, I would go with him.

  I stroked his wrist. “It’s okay. It’s over.”

  He let go of Dad abruptly, confusion plain on his face. He took a few steps away from me before glaring at my father. “Don’t even look at her again,” he said.

  Dad held his neck, coughing hard. I couldn’t look him in the eye. I was glad he had gotten a taste of his own medicine, but I knew the taste was bitter and hard to swallow. I felt uncomfortable for him. I should have been happy, but a thread of pity kept tangling up my emotions.

  “Come with me,” Brendan said in a cool voice.

  I obeyed because I knew it wasn’t the time to argue. I left my father there, left the groups of students to their frenzied gossip, even Zoe. Brendan slowed to grab my arm, making me hurry alongside him. We walked for ten minutes until we came to a broken wall.

  “Through here,” he said. “We’ll be safe for a while.”

  He pushed me through the gap that I couldn’t remember ever seeing before, and I stepped into another world. When I thought about it, I couldn’t remember where we had stepped through.

  “Where are we?” I asked, gazing around me.

  “Fae realm. My world.”

  The place was beautiful, the way I imagined Ireland of old to be, and filled with magic. Multiple rainbows adorned the purple sky. The warmth in the air belied the time of year. I stood on vibrant green grass, and woods and paths were all around. I couldn’t see much in the distance, but one of the paths led through an orchard, while another ended at a large pond. Over the tops of the trees, I could see a mountain range, but I couldn’t tell how far away it was.