Adversity (Cursed #2.5) Read online

  Was Kali attracted to him because she couldn’t have him, because she was smothered by rules? Did she hope, instead, that he would free her? I couldn’t forget the things she had said about curses and werewolves. She was a curse-maker, but she would be the mother of werewolves. How did that fit? It was a dream, I reminded myself.

  “Are you okay?” Connor’s whisper barely reached my ears.

  “Fine,” I replied, embarrassed as I realised I’d been shaking my head. Never again. Never. Again. No way was I going out with normal kids again. Nathan was right. I should stay away unless I could put on a mask and hide my feelings. Not fitting in or being scared of my heritage had never bothered me before, but now… now everything was different.

  I gave Connor a sideways glance and saw he was again immersed in the film. Sighing quietly, I sat back in my seat and waited for the film to end so I could get home. Then again, home wasn’t exactly the nicest place to be, and I could do with annoying my new stalker, Jeremy, by keeping him busy a little longer. So, when Ger invited me to get something to eat, I quickly said “yes.”

  The fast-food place was crowded, but we all squeezed around one small table. With someone’s knees pressed into my legs, my temperature rose rapidly. Again, sweat dripped down my back, and I wondered if I might be coming down with something. My hormones were completely out of whack and making me crazy. I’d been ready to scream at my grandfather numerous times. What was wrong with me?

  “I have to go,” I said abruptly.

  “Go? Why?” Ger asked. “We can all head back together in, like, half an hour, tops. Where are you going?”

  “I’m… I need to go. I’ll see you in school. Thanks for inviting me.”

  Hurrying from the restaurant, I bumped into numerous strangers as I ran toward the bus stop. Being alone freaked me out even more than being around so many others. I couldn’t see Jeremy anywhere, and I wondered if he knew I knew he was hanging around. I hoped he wouldn’t come near me. I didn’t fancy being alone with him.

  Before I could panic, I sensed someone else behind me. Connor.

  “Connor, I…”

  Turning around, my sentence cut off as I realised he was way behind me. Way, way behind me. He wouldn’t hear me if I spoke, yet I’d known he was out there, which was the strangest thing ever. How had I known? Was it a happy coincidence or something else? Had I smelled him? I didn’t think so. He wasn’t my mate, and I wasn’t a werewolf, though I might be, one day. Still, I hadn’t dreamt about him, so we weren’t exactly meant to be together, even if I was supposed to change some day.

  He caught up with me before I could figure out what to make of the situation.

  “I needed to leave,” he said.

  “Okay.”

  “Sorry if you wanted to be alone.”

  For a second he looked like an awkward kid, unsure of himself. Then the impression was gone, and the cool exterior returned. I tried in vain to remember if I had seen him much at school. Why hadn’t I noticed him? I’d been so preoccupied with everything else that I probably hadn’t noticed a whole lot of things.

  “It’s fine,” I said, wondering if he was waiting on an answer.

  “Good. Should be a bus in the next five or ten minutes if you want to hurry.”

  We walked together without speaking much, but the silence wasn’t uncomfortable. In fact, I felt calmer than I had in a while. I didn’t worry about making conversation or trying to act normal. The silence helped me maintain some sort of control. It was… soothing to be around Connor.

  The bus arrived, and Connor laid his hand gently on the base of my back as if to push me ahead. I stiffened at his touch, and he dropped his arm immediately.

  “Sorry, I…”

  He shook his head. “I get it.”

  Did he? I didn’t even “get it.” He was a perfectly nice boy. Okay-looking, quiet, and normal. Nothing that sparked off any red alerts. What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I like him or at least try to be normal?

  We sat at the back of the bus, both of us occupying a double seat of our own. I wasn’t sure how to react to Connor. As much as he calmed me, his silence could unsettle me, too, because I didn’t know exactly what he wanted. If he wanted to talk… or more.

  I twisted my hair around my finger, agitated by the light in the bus. I felt exposed—as if I couldn’t hide anymore. Funny how much it bothered me, considering how annoyed I was at home for being invisible.

  “This is my stop,” I said as the bus turned the corner close to my home.

  Connor stood.

  “It’s okay,” I said hurriedly. “I don’t need to be walked home.”

  “This is my stop, too.”

  “Oh.”

  We got off the bus in silence. I felt my face blush deeply, in the dark. Of course it was his stop. He had to live close enough to me. I’d made a complete fool of myself how many times now? I couldn’t wait to go home and forget about the whole evening.

  “I’m this way,” I told him, pointing ahead. He walked alongside me. “I… where do you live?”

  “The other way.”

  “Like I said, I don’t need…”

  “I know. And I’d rather not think about you walking home in the dark on a creepy old road.” He took a deep breath. “So, can I walk you home, Amelia?”

  “I… okay.” I shrugged slightly, trying to act as though his asking me wasn’t important, instead of incredibly appealing. That apologetic manner was so similar to Andriy, and I felt goose bumps rise on my arms as he tipped against me accidentally. Feeling that I had a choice was unusual for me. Any member of my family would have told me how it was, and that would be it. No discussion. No asking nicely. I wondered what he would have done if I had said no.

  He didn’t speak again until we got to my house. “You should hang around with everyone again,” he said as we stood at my gate, both of us fidgeting.

  “Yeah, maybe.” I risked looking at his eyes again, which were probably his best feature. He wasn’t ugly, but his eyes were the only thing that really stood out to me. He looked… scared. “Amelia! You okay?” Nathan called from the doorway.

  “Yes!” I snapped. “Go away!”

  Connor rubbed his face, blushing. “’Night, Amelia.”

  Embarrassed myself, I stormed into my house, barging past my suddenly protective older brother.

  “Thanks a bunch,” I practically snarled.

  “What’s that about?”

  “Oh, come on! Did you really think I couldn’t handle saying goodnight to him?”

  “Amelia… I was worried. I didn’t know who he was, and…”

  “Nathan! You can smell a werewolf from a mile away now! You know he’s a normal kid. And don’t act as though you didn’t have Jeremy following me around.”

  He had the grace to look embarrassed, and I strode up the stairs, shaking with annoyance and frustration. I didn’t know what I wanted, but it wasn’t my family chasing away any new friends I might make.

  “I’m trying to keep you safe,” he called after me.

  “Safe from what? From having friends? A life? Fun, maybe? I don’t need your help. I’m not one of you, so let’s leave it at that, okay?”

  In my room, I lay in bed and mulled over the entire day. I felt as though everything had changed. I badly wanted to speak to Perdita, to look for something, advice… anything. But how could I face her? I needed my family to get together, to sort through all of the things that had gone wrong. Yet they couldn’t all be in the same room for longer than five minutes without all of the pain in their hearts seeping through and multiplying. I wanted normality and real friends that had nothing to do with curses or werewolves, but I was an awkward mess around ordinary teenagers as I constantly worried I’d spit out words I wasn’t supposed to say. Most of all, I wanted to know more about my dreams. I needed to see where they would take me and where they would end. I needed to know why I wanted to sleep so I could be with Andriy for a few more minutes.

  That thought jer
ked me upward. I genuinely wanted to spend time with a dream man. A man with a wife and responsibilities. He was a teenager, but probably the most forbidden kind of man for me. Or rather, for Kali. I wished Kali would get out of my head so I could be sure of what I was feeling again.

  I needed guidance and reassurance and somebody to steer me on the right path.

  My eyes fell on the spirit board again. One more time, I promised myself, busily lighting candles to prepare. I said the usual and called out for Mémère, hoping for the best.

  The windows shuddered, and I had to make a conscious effort to keep from wrapping my arms around my body. My voice shook a little as I called out for my grandmother again, laying my fingertips on the cup.

  It moved, only slightly, but still, it was movement.

  I called out again, as dread filled the pit of my stomach. I didn’t know why. I tried to pull my fingers away, but they stuck fast, as if something was holding on to me. I struggled to get away, but the cup moved, and my body stilled immediately.

  I can give you guidance.

  “Is that you, Mémère? I’m so glad you’re here. I need you. I need help. What do I do? How do I fix everything?”

  Take my place.

  “What? What do you mean? Take care of everyone? I’m a bit young for that.”

  So was I when it all began. Take my place, and everything will fall in line again.

  “Okay… I’ll try. I mean, I…”

  Sleep. I’ll be with you. You’ll see everything soon. The time is approaching, heart of mine.

  The cup fell over. I crawled backward, disturbed by the event. The atmosphere and presence hadn’t felt like Mémère. The scent was familiar somehow, but it was nothing like my grandmother’s. I fell asleep with little effort that night, but my dreams were a nightmarish mess of violence, and darkness, and shadows creeping over me and pulling me under.

  Chapter Eleven

  Amelia

  I couldn’t concentrate at school knowing that Nathan was voluntarily facing up to that werewolf. He had actually agreed to meet Ryan, the red werewolf that had first terrified me in the woods. What was he thinking? I already knew the answer to that. Like Kali, he didn’t care about the consequences. He was all about happiness in the now. Forget about tomorrow. He was practicing stupidity at its best, as far as I was concerned.

  “You okay? You’re quiet today,” Ger said.

  “Yeah, I know. Just thinking about Perdita.” No way was I getting into what exactly I was thinking about, but she stared at me expectantly. “I was thinking of going to see her at the hospital.”

  “Cool. I’ll come with.”

  “That’s okay. I mean, it’ll be boring.”

  She flashed a grin and ignored my pretty obvious attempt to fob her off. “We’ll go after school.”

  That told me. “I’ll try to get in touch with her. See if she’s up for it.”

  “Great.”

  I assumed Ger would forget about it, but after school, she and Julie waited for me outside.

  “You did tell her, right?” Ger asked.

  I had, or at least, I’d told Nathan to ask her if she wanted me to visit. She told him yes, but part of me was still terrified. I hadn’t told anyone about the way I reacted when her dad was hurt. I hadn’t spoken to her, and I was still a little mad that she had persuaded Nathan to do something pointless and dangerous.

  But I missed her.

  Julie yapped in my ear the entire way, but I couldn’t listen to whatever she was waffling about. What if Perdita read in my eyes what I was thinking? What if she sensed all of the things that were wrong?

  “She’s over there,” Ger said, pointing at a bench up ahead.

  “Yeah, I know.” I had known exactly where she would be without even knowing how. “Maybe you two should wait here. I have to talk to her about some stuff.”

  “That’s cool. Take your time.”

  I wished I were as laid back as they seemed to be. Nothing bothered Julie. Not even obvious apathy. As for Ger, she didn’t take no for an answer, but I kind of liked her for it.

  My feet might have been stuck in quicksand for my lack of speed to find Perdita. The look on her face when she saw me served to overwhelm me all the more. She looked happy and relieved. She wasn’t angry; she was genuinely pleased to see me, which made my visit so much more difficult. A sudden lump made my throat ache, and I didn’t have a chance to hold back the tears burning my eyes. I had abandoned her when she needed me, and she didn’t hold it against me. She wasn’t like me, who wanted revenge for every perceived slight. What had I been thinking? She was my friend, but I hadn’t been acting as her friend for a second.

  I reached her, and she gathered me in her arms, comforting me. The tears were cathartic, but the guilt felt like real needles piercing my heart.

  “I’m so sorry about your dad. I don’t know what’s happening to us.”

  The calm on her face soothed me a little, but my hiccups and sobs didn’t disappear.

  “He’s going to be fine.” Her voice was steady, as though she firmly believed it herself. “He just needs a few days of rest.”

  “Opa thinks he’s poisoned or something.”

  “How would he know? Did something happen to Nathan and Jeremy?” She tensed up, and I drew away from her to reassure her properly.

  “No, I haven’t heard anything yet. I feel really bad about everything, though, and I miss you at school.”

  She gazed at me keenly. “No offence, but you look way more miserable than just missing me at school. Is something wrong? Did Tammie say something to you again?”

  I laughed at the protectiveness of her tone.

  “When she’s not ignoring me, she’s actually kind of nice. No, I’m a little stressed out. All of this family stuff and the dreams… it’s as if there’s something constantly weighing me down. I keep getting these migraines, but I suppose it’s because of the stress.”

  “Wanna talk about the dreams?”

  “They aren’t important. Not really. It’s how they make me feel when I wake up. As if I’m in the wrong place. And I’ve met a boy I kind of like. Except I care more about the people in my dreams than him.” I held my breath then, waiting for her reaction.

  Her eyes widened with concern. “That’s a little… out there, Amelia.”

  I shouldn’t have said anything. I should have known better. “Never mind! When are you coming back to school?”

  She held my hand and made me sit on the bench. “Not sure. Probably soon, unless Dad signs me into a mental institution.”

  Her lips twisted into a crooked smile, but something told me she was deadly serious.

  “Why would he do that?”

  “Because he thinks I’m losing it.”

  That amused me. “Best not tell him I think I’m a reincarnated gypsy, then.”

  She leaned back a little, as though taking it in. “You don’t… you don’t really think that, though, do you?”

  I had to get it off my chest. I couldn’t keep holding in everything, but I wondered if she was the right person to tell.

  “I don’t know what to believe, Perdita. But there are so many similarities between me and this dream girl. It’s freaking me out.”

  “It’s probably just a dream,” she said at last.

  “Yeah. I bet you said the same thing before we came along.”

  She winced. “Try not to dwell on the dreams. If they mean anything, you’ll know when you’re meant to.”

  Just like that. Avoid and sugar-coat. She was more of an Evans than I was.

  “Wow. Way to sort my problems.” Why would she? My problems were at the bottom of an incredibly large pile. I still felt the bite, though.

  “I’m sorry. I’m worried about Nathan. I hate the idea of him working with that wolf. She bit Dad. How am I supposed to stop seeing her as the enemy?”

  I got that. Ryan would likely come with his pack mate, whether we liked it or not. I could never forget the way those werewolves had attacke
d us, so I didn’t understand how Perdita could find a way to trust the male just because he suddenly claimed to be on our side.

  “How are we supposed to stop seeing either of them as the enemy?”

  She shrugged. “I know. Trust me. But if you heard him… you’d see. You’d get it.”

  Nobody ever expected me to understand. Right then, I didn’t even want to. We made small talk for a couple of minutes—I even told her a little about Ger and Connor—before I retreated to my new friends. Being around them was peaceful because I knew they would never reveal anything remotely life-threatening.

  But I was dying to hear from Nathan about what happened during his enemy werewolf meeting, so I made excuses to leave them.

  “Okay. Wanna hang around with us later on?” Ger asked.

  “I don’t know…”

  “Come on, it’ll be fun.” Julie smiled reassuringly.

  “Yeah? What are you all doing?”

  Julie shrugged, frowning in confusion. “Just, you know, hanging around.”

  I agreed to meet up with them later on, but first I had to hear the news from Nathan. I headed home, my head full of questions.

  “I believe him,” Nathan said as we sat on the swings out back, our unofficial meeting place.

  “Seriously? He’s a killer. Why wouldn’t he be a liar, too?”

  “He’s not a killer, and he’s not lying,” he insisted. “And even if he was, I’d still be doing this because we can’t sit around wondering what they’re going to do next. We have to face up to this.”

  He sounded different, as if he had accepted what was about to happen.

  “What about her? The she-wolf. Was she telling the truth, too?”

  He shook his head and gave a low whistle. “She’s crazy. Scares the crap out of me. There’s a piece of her missing. Ryan reckons that all of the bred wolves have something missing. It’s weird.”

  “Sounds like crap to me.”

  “Amelia. Stop. I have to do something. Cut me some slack.”